dawn

It really bothers me when people try to force their way into my life such as guys who want to date me. I've got issues and I know that but I also know that I have to deal with them on my own because I don't want help. I don't need help dealing with my problems nor do I wish to have some guy trying to 'fix' or 'help' me. I can help myself and if I needed or wanted their help I would ask. The biggest problem is when they think that my warning them to leave before I push them away, is some reverse physiology to convince them to stay. They never listen to my telling them to leave or that they are just wasting their time. They always think that deep down I want them to stay but because of the 'walls' I've built I'm telling them to go. I know what I'm capable of when it comes to hurting a guy; whether that be on purpose or not on purpose. I tell them to leave, they don't and in the end when I've pushed them away they get all hurt and are all like 'I didn't know this would happen'. I told them it would but no one listens to me.

I hate it when you are talking to someone and they ask you a question. And your answer to the question is something that you know they won't like. So you ask them if they want the honest answer, they say yes of course, so you tell them and then you find out that they didn't really want the honest answer. They said that they did but in all honesty they didn't want the truth they wanted you to tell them what they wanted to hear and feel all good inside. I can't stand it because when I say I want the truth I'm not looking for an answer that will make me feel good I'm looking for the truth. I am finding that I may be one of the few people out there who when asking for the truth, honestly wanting the truth.