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This is a true story from the WordPerfect help line. Needless to say the help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause". Actual dialogue of a former Word perfect Customer Support employee:


Rep: "Word Perfect Technical support; may I help you?"


Cust: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."


Rep: "What sort of trouble?"


Cust: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."


Rep: "Went away?"


Cust: "They disappeared."


Rep: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"


Cust: "Nothing."


Rep: "Nothing?"


Cust: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."


Rep: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"


Cust: "How do I tell?"


Rep: "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"


Cust: "What's a sea-prompt?"


Rep: "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"


Cust: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."


Rep: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"


Cust: "What's a monitor?"


Rep: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"


Cust: "I don't know."


Rep: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"


Cust: "..... Yes, I think so."


Rep: "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."


Cust: "..... Yes, it is."


Rep: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"


Cust: "No."


Rep: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."


Cust: "..... Okay, here it is."


Rep: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."


Cust: "I can't reach it."


Rep: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"


Cust: "No."


Rep: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"


Cust: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."


Rep: "Dark?"


Cust: "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."


Rep: "Well, turn on the office light then."


Cust: "I can't."


Rep: "No? Why not?"


Cust: "Because there's a power outage."


Rep: "A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"


Cust: "Well, yes. I keep them in the closet."


Rep: "Good! Go get them and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."


Cust: "Really! Is it that bad?"


Rep: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."


Cust: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"


Rep: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."




Sources: Snopes --- Progress

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