fluffyrat

happiness

It didn't anger me and I didn't mean for it to come off like that. He knows how I feel. We have a VERY open relationship. He always used to love his job until he got transferred to a cutter, now it's terrible. I think everyday a conversation arises involving his not wanting to re-enlist. I do support him and want him to work out the rest of his career. He's nearly halfway there. (He has 13 years left.) He knows that I have a difficult time when they leave and that I absolutely hate it, but he also knows that I'm very proud of him. He's doing something that very few people can do. I know the bright side is that there are only 6 patrols left before he gets off the boat and never has to go back to another cutter again. I was mostly just venting. This last patrol was very difficult because I got left home with a newborn. I don't resent him, I know it's not his fault and he knows it as well. We were both angry at the command as if the baby HADN'T come prematurely they were going to allow him to leave the patrol for a month, but after the baby came early, and had health problems and I was recovering from surgery, they didn't give him ANY time off. It would occurr to me that his presence would be less necessary had the child been full term, but then again, "We mustn't set a soft precident." Oh well, he's home now and he'll be home for the holidays. I lose him in October but I'll deal.

Wow, HARSH!

I don't think my son will EVER get a cell phone, lol. A $200/month phone bill is CRAZY! The kid can have a piece of paper, a pencil, an envelope and a stamp. Geez, I'm mean aren't I? This may sound crazy, but when I was a kid, we used the house phone to call our friends. Everyone didn't have a cell phone in their hip pocket. Crap, now I sound like my Grandma, lmao. Geez, growing up sure does suck, doesn't it?

OMG if ONE more person tells me that I'll scream. Have you ever met anyone who said, "Oh, that guy's cute and has a nice stable job I think I'll fall in love with him?" No. That's b/c we don't CHOOSE who we fall in love with. I wasn't going to not marry my soul mate just because of his job, that'd be dumb. Anyway, yes, I DID know he was in the coast guard and that he was being transferred to a cutter that summer but that certainly doesn't make it any easier. Somehow the baby does though. Its distracting having someone to take care of. Anyway, there's only a year and a half yet and then he NEVER sees another boat again. WOOHOO!

What really upsets me is my husband's job. He's in the coast guard and I know it's an important job and I support him and all, but I REALLY hate that he's on a cutter. He has to leave for 2 months EVERY 2 months. He even had to leave right after the baby was born! It was HORRIBLE! I also hate being home alone. It's so creepy. The whole house to myself and I can here the neighbors in an out. (I neve stayed alone much, can you tell?) Also, I'm a bit of a pansy. I know I live in a good are, but it's still Portsmouth. It just gets to me.

Headache. Would you rather be locked in a room with a screaming infant or a screaming alzheimer's patient?

I think that infuriates me even more now. It has always made me REALLY angry though. I could NEVER leave Landon alone in the car. Even when I'm in the 7-11 for a soda, he goes with me. That's just obvious.

I think what really sucks is that my son was born 6 weeks early because he had a cord wrapped around his neck. Now he has 2 hernias that need to be operated on and the only reason they're there is because he was early! That's what REALLY sucks in life. That and the fact that I can't take his place.

Die in the hospital. Would you rather have a spouse you can't stand to be around who is always home or have a spouse you can't get enough of who is away from home for the half the year?